Tuesday, March 13, 2018

Fitbit takes a dump...

Sunday, March 11, 2018

I had spent most of the day Saturday putting the doors on my cabinets and preparing the ‘Man Cave’ as I had had my old office in Highland Heights.  All my personal effects, pictures and memorabilia came out of boxes and landed on walls, shelved and counters I’d built.  Once finished, I reclined in my favorite chair for the first time and looked around.  It was like pulling on a warm, familiar blanket and for the first time since moving to Peninsula I can honestly say it felt like my home.

With temperatures in the mid-thirties, I decided against trying to ride.  Maybe I’m a sissy Mary, but I know Spring is just around the river bend and I’m just getting a little soft in my old age.  Dakota and I took a hike, though, pushing my steps over 20,000.  Once I got home, I decided I wanted to know how many steps I’d averaged over the month of March, so I tried synching my Fitbit watch with the app on my phone.  Nothing happened.  I tried several things, but could see technology was going to beat me so I tried the Fitbit helpline on the computer.  I started a text-type conversation with something or someone – but I’m pretty sure it was not a human based on the vernacular.  At a point, it/she (Wendy) asked if I was willing to try a different approach.  I typed, ‘you haven’t tried anything yet’.  And she/it hadn’t.  She/it typed back, ‘is that a yes?’

I could see where this was going and typed ‘yes’ and received a response about warranty and having had the Fitbit more than a year.  I wrote back ‘goodbye’ and signed off.  I quickly received an email from Fitbit asking me about my experience and whether I’d take a survey.  I replied, ‘no thanks.  You didn’t do anything and you suck’.  They didn’t write back or check about my dissatisfaction.

I was given the Fitbit by my kids for Christmas, 2016.  I’d been wearing and enjoying it for the 15 months since then, but it came with a 1-year warranty.  It costs $150, but they will only stand behind it for a year.  After that I guess it disposable or you buy an extended warranty because they built them so poorly that you’ll need it.  I don’t like that approach.  I was hoping to just have a human walk me through whatever I needed to do to get it synching again, but I think they knew my unit was fundamentally flawed and I was going to need a new one.  Well…I’m not buying one.  And I don’t recommend Fitbit to anyone else.  I don’t recommend anything that lasts such as short period of time and with limited support from the manufacturer.  It’s a good tool and got me taking hikes I might not have taken otherwise, but it needs to have a longer shelf life.  I miss the Craftsman ‘guaranteed for life’ kind of stuff.  What an old fart I am.

The second snow storm from hell...

Friday, March 9, 2018
I knew we were supposed to get some snow, so my alarm was set for 4:30 a.m. so I’d have enough time to get to work, plow and clear all the pasture gates early.  I was pleasantly surprised when I opened to door to my house and saw only a dusting.  Still, I was up so I headed into work.

As I headed north on I271, I began to realize that the farm likely had more snow than I’d gotten in Peninsula.  As I made my final approach to the service drive on a road that hadn’t been plowed in the last couple of hours, I noticed the mound blocking my entrance.  I got out of my low-riding Toyota Camry and realized I’d never make it through the foot that had fallen in Geauga County.

I followed one of the barn staff into the main parking lot.  She had a truck and cut a nice swath for me to follow.  From there, it was all downhill.  I began shoveling out pasture gates of the heavy, wet snow that had drifted to two feet in some places.  I was sweating at least, so the workout had begun.

It lasted five hours.  Completely exhausted by noon, I looked for something I could do from a chair with my brain.  I made some calls to contractors I needed for several projects we would be doing over the summer.  Recovered after lunch, I did several more outdoor chores before heading for Jason’s place where I would be helping him pick up a new and heavy dining room table to move in and an old one to move out.  I got to his driveway ahead of him and found the bottom plowed in and half the drive unshoveled.  That just wouldn’t do so I spent thirty minutes cleaning it out. 
“I’ve got a snow blower, dad, so why did you shovel?” he asked when he arrived.


“I like to shovel,” I said.

He looked at me like I was disturbed.  Ah well…maybe I am. 

Friday, March 9, 2018

We took the picture...

Wednesday, March 7, 2018

“This time we’re going to do just what I say we’re going to do,” I announced to Lisa.

I was referring to the photo shoot retake we were about to do since our last effort had ended when the Christmas box prop had blown to pieces in the gale force winds last Friday.  I tried not to say ‘I told you so’ when it happened, but the ladies organizing the photo shoot were sheepish enough that it didn’t need to be said.

In the meantime, I’d built some wooden supports to which I was planning to attach pieces of the prop in the hopes that the wind would not repeat its devastation.  My back up plan was a giant ribbon to attach to the horse with Christmas ornaments on an evergreen tree behind him for effect.  The Christmas box in the background would be a bonus.

We had everything set and when Jackson was brought out, he immediately began to act up.

“He hears his pals in the pasture and wants to go and play,” Lisa said.

Boy, was she ever right.  He was pulling, biting, prancing and doing everything except posing for the picture.  I shot fifty or more pictures before we gave it up and led him to the pasture where he was so anxious to go.

I had a backup plan for the Christmas card, though. 

“I’m going to get on my tractor and drive it in front of the manure pile.  I’ll wear my ‘John Deere’ hat and hold that beautiful ribbon.  It’ll be the best Christmas card the farm’s every sent out,” I said.

The ladies lined up to watch while one took the picture.  They really got into it and were shouting suggestions.  I pretty sure they won’t use it, but I will.

It was too cold to ride and besides, I owed Dakota a decent hike.  We headed out as the sun was setting on a windy, brisk evening.  We made it to the covered bridge and back, which is a good five-mile hike.  I could feel yesterday’s ride in my thighs as I climbed each hill and wondered about aging and maybe losing a little.  Nah.  I’m still just out of shape and carrying too much weight.  Those things will change as the weather improves, though I’m not complaining about it since I’ve ridden 7-8 times through February and March – a time of the year when I should not be able to do so.

Dakota and I did a 5-mile hike once I got home.  It was brisk with some sleet blowing in our faces and definitely not riding weather.  Unless you’re Lance.
Hike: 90 minutes
Training Heart Rate: 75 bpm.
Calories Burned: 525
Bonus: 24,000 steps.

Wednesday, March 7, 2018


Tuesday, March 6, 2018

While watching Lance Armstrong on a six-hour training ride in a cold rain, a segment of the documentary ‘The Armstrong Lie’ Monday night, it occurred to me just how much punishment and pain cyclists put themselves through.  If it is raining, I won’t even start a ride.  It’s too uncomfortable, not great for the bike, and unsafe for the rider.  Tires don’t grab well on slick pavement and brakes aren’t as good as when they’re dry.  But it’s that cold, wet rain penetrating to every ounce of your skin on a sustained ride that makes it most miserable.  On two recent rides I’ve started out dry, but with rain in the forecast.  Both times I thought I’d get lucky…and I’m 0 for 2.  I whined during and after.  I saw Lance saddling up and riding out into a rain storm, knowing he’d be going for six hours.  Hell…I’m not crazy about riding six hours when it’s sunny and seventy.

Yesterday however, was a different story.  The forecast said mixed rain and snow for the late afternoon and it was around 35 degrees and overcast when I left the farm, so I had no intention of riding.  I’m a real sissy Mary.  As I drove into the valley though, the skies began to clear.  I checked my car thermometer, which read ‘47’.

“No way,” I said out loud.  “I think I’m gonna ride.”

I got home to an excited Dakota.  She had that ‘let’s go for a walk, daddy’ thing going on, but I let her in on the secret.

“Dakota – I’m riding.  Sorry, but your walk will have to wait,” I said, with some guilt.

I headed up SR 303 east with the intention of riding the paved bike/hike trail north.  My goal was to follow it as it sloped gradually back towards the valley and pick up Riverview Road for my ride back home.  After crossing several roads and thinking I was far enough north to affect my plan, I stopped at one of those ‘you are here’ kiosks to see exactly where I was.  Aurora Road was directly in front of me and on the map it showed that it crossed toe Towpath down in the valley.  It has a wide shoulder in good condition, so I elected to follow it down.

After a couple of miles and very little descent, I started wondering about where I would be picking up the Towpath.  I could see a bridge just ahead and as I rode out on it and looked down, I noticed the Towpath snaking its way along the Cuyahoga River…200 yards below.

“Shit,” I said to no one.

I crossed into Brecksville where I got my bearings and realized was at the intersection where Riverview Road dropped into the valley.  I raced down the hill and picked up the Towpath.

I had my road tires on the bike and riding on what is normally hard packed limestone screenings is not a problem.  Soft packed from a recent snow however, is problematic.  At two different times, I nearly went down as my front tire sunk into mud and started to slide.  Maybe fifty years on a bike had something to do with my staying upright, but I figured the sooner I got off the Towpath and back on pavement, the better.  I rode four miles on this marginal surface before doing just that for the return home.

It had cooled considerably as the sun set with the temperature closer to 35 by the time I made it home.  Still, I was thrilled with being able to challenge the elements just a little and get in another winter ride.  The next several days will likely not be so favorable, but Dakota will be happy because we’ll be hiking instead.
Bike duration: Two hours.
Training Heart Rate: 135 bpm.
Calories Burned: 1,500.

Tuesday, March 6, 2018

The Armstrong Lie

Monday, March 5, 2018

I was just completing my evening hike with Dakota when I saw Don pulling up for one of our spaghetti dinner/baseball movie nights.  He, John and I get together once a month during the off-season to watch something – anything – baseball, eat spaghetti and pontificate on how much we know about whatever any one of us is discussing. 

Except we weren’t going to be eating spaghetti and we weren’t going to be watching baseball.

“I brought you here under false pretenses,” I said.  “If you want to sue me, John will be here in a moment and I’m sure he’ll be happy to represent you.”

John knew what we were watching and told Don as he closed the door behind him moments later.

“’The Armstrong Lie’,” he said.

I’d noticed…and watched – the fascinating documentary a week ago and called John, the other huge fan and hugely disappointed former supporter of Lance.  I explained that we’d be having Amish casserole since it wasn’t a baseball night.

They loved it and after eating and listening to Don tell us how he’d quit his pharmaceutical job after 30 years in the business because of the unrelenting hassling he’d been receiving to get him to do just that, moved into the family room for the show. 

“I’m gonna pick something up.  I was planning to retire next year anyway – just like you, but the chicken shit was getting to be too much,” he said.  I know that feeling.

The documentary had been the creation of Alex Gibney, the man that had started to create a documentary in 2009 based on Lance’s comeback to the Tour d France after a four year layoff following his seven consecutive Tour victories.  His goal was to capture a totally clean Lance winning the Tour as an almost forty-year old and thus vindicating his previous Tour accomplishments as supposedly drug-free.  But Lance’s comeback sparked something in the people who knew the true story and as he progressed, more and more came out and told their story.  When it got to federal prosecutors and a grand jury, no one was practicing ‘Omerta’ any longer and it all came up.  His ‘clean’ comeback in 2009 was anything but, as he told us in 2013 to Oprah Winfrey…and the world.

Gibney told Lance that he owed it to him to do a documentary where he told the entire story of his doping, which he turned into the program we were watching.

He is an amazing liar.  He is also the best cyclist the world has ever seen.  In an era where all the best riders in the sport were also using performance enhancing drugs and methods, he beat the best for seven straight years.  I have no doubt that if everyone in the peloton had been clean – including him and his teammates – he’d still have beaten them.  He was a physiological anomaly, perfectly designed to endure the demands of the world’s most difficult athletic event.  He had the work ethic of a maniacal athlete that would push, and punish, his body to the limits of human endurance to prepare himself for victory.  He investigated every aspect of cycling – the equipment, race strategy, team support, and the psychological side of racing, to be sure that he would make ‘every second count’.

“I love to win, but more importantly, I hate to lose,” he stated during one interview.  And you could see this in him.  There was no doubt.  But he also hated to lose his power he had acquired by becoming the iconic, cancer-beating, cycling champion and was willing to use any and all of it to discredit those who came out against him and spoke the truth about his cheating.  It is this that disturbs the last of his supporters – like me – the most.  It is the part of his legacy that I think will be impossible for him to ever correct, though I hope he tries.  As Spiderman’s uncle says to Toby McGuire in the first creation of the Marvel comic story, “with great power comes great responsibility.”
Bonus: 20,000 steps.



"We have to be careful my boots don't get muddy..."

Sunday, March 4, 2018
My sister-in-law had a birthday, so I called to offer greetings.

“I just want you to know that I always think how cool it is to have a birthdate like yours.  March 4, 1956 – 3/4/56 – well…it’s just cool.  I can’t remember much, but I can remember that date,” I said. 

She thanked me, glad that her date was easy for me to remember.  I went about working on my cabinets while Miggie prepared her daughter’s taxes.  We had agreed that we’d go for a hike in the afternoon since the sun was shining and the trails were reasonably dry.  But when the taxes were done I noticed both ladies sitting on the sofa and watching some brainless movie.  I looked a Miggie and she returned my stare with sheepish guilt.

“I thought we were going for a hike?  Dakota and I are headed out in any event.  You couch potatoes enjoy,” I said.

It had the desired effect.  Diana said, “I can go if it’s not muddy.  I have my good boots on.”  They were a brown suede of some kind.

“I’ll carry you over any mud, princess.  I could use the extra workout,” I offered.

I assured her that we’d be taking a hike that was all paved.  “We’ll do the Hale Farm and Village hike.  A little mud in the parking lot across the street, but not enough water to melt anyone.”

Suspiciously, they followed.  They tried to walk off-path to avoid the one puddle and then returned to the trail.  Diana was inspecting her boots.

“It’s only MUD!  It’ll brush off when it dries,” I said.

She didn’t look convinced.  We hiked all the way to the Everett Road covered bridge, which is 2.5 miles away where I turned them around for the return trip.  Diana looked puzzled.

“We have to go all the way back the way we came?”

“Nope.  We could just stay here and call Uber,” I said.

Miggie thought it would be quicker if we continued on but walked in the road to avoid the mud of the trail that would take us back to our place via the towpath.

“Can’t walk in the road with Dakota and the trail would soil those nice boots Diana has on, so turn around,” I said.

I had loaded Miggie’s old bike in Diana’s SUV when she’d arrived and I reminded her that if she lived here and was willing to hike and bike, I’d have her down to 120 pounds by the end of the summer.  “I told your mama the same thing, but I just can’t get her out the door.  I know what to do, but I can’t do it for anyone,” I said.

We finished the hike in about two hours.  Neither one of them had done so much in a very long time and both were hurting.  Dakota and I did it every day and didn’t give it much thought.  It’s just walking my brain tells me, but for many people it is a whole lot more.  In any event, I think it opened both their eyes to what they needed to be doing more often.
Hike: Two hours
Training Heart Rate: 75 bpm.
Calories Burned: 700

Monday, March 5, 2018

Sometimes I'm just right...

Friday, March 2, 2018
I can’t be sure but I think March is that ‘in like a lion and out like a lamb’ month, though it could be April.  In any event, it absolutely roared its way in.

I’d been hearing reports of a snowfall from co-workers and there was talk of doing the photo shoot for next year’s farm Christmas card utilizing a prop I had in my shop.  The prop was a huge 6’x’6’ box made out of pink insulation board and painted and ribboned to look like a giant Christmas present.  It was to be placed in the snow, which we were hoping to get before the end of the winter, and then have one of the horses stand nearby as if there was another one in the box?  Anyway, it was big enough for a horse to fit in.

I’d talked to a couple of the women planning this photo shoot…I was to be the photographer…and warned them that if we did have a snow, the temperatures were mid-thirties, which meant the ground would be mud underneath and that it likely wouldn’t stick long – or at all. 

“And remember…if there is a snowstorm, I’m the guy who has to remove it from the parking lots, service drives, pasture gates and sidewalks.  It takes me several hours,” I said.

I set my alarm for 4:30 a.m. since a heavy snow had started to fall before I’d gone to bed.  Good thing.  I woke to 8 inches of the wet, heavy stuff on the ground in the valley, which meant probably more at the farm.  I made it there by six and began moving the biggest mess of snow of the year.  Around nine, I ran into one of my photo shoot organizers.

“Looks like this is the day!” she said gleefully.

I frowned and said, “I’ve got a couple of more hours of snow removal and the wind is gusting quite hard.  If I take that box built like a kite outside, it is going to blow all to hell.  It’s only glued together,” I reminded her.

“This may be our only chance,” she said.

“Well…if you want the box in the picture, you’ll really need to wait for a calmer day,” I repeated.

She looked disappointed and I headed outside to do some work on our electric fence line.  The wind was howling, making my job almost impossible and as I tried I realized there was absolutely no way to bring the prop out intact.  If we did and it blew to pieces as I was sure it would, it might also scare the hell out of the horse and that’s never a good thing.  We did have a huge ribbon on top of the box though and it occurred to me that maybe we could take it off, put it on the horse and take a picture that way saving the box for another day.  I was sure there would be more snow and better conditions before the end of the season.

“We’re going for it now, John,” my photo organizer said as I walked back in the building.

Now I was annoyed.  Not only was she ignoring any advice I had on the conditions and what they would do to the prop, she wasn’t allowing me time to finish snow removal.  Normally I go along with anything they want, but this was ridiculous.  But I was outvoted.

I went back to the shop and began shoveling away the two-foot drift blocking my garage door – the only way to take the box out.  When the committee gathered and saw what I was doing and felt the wind whistling, they began to worry.  Full steam ahead at this point though.

I placed boards under the box so that we could lift it and went over the spot where we hoped to take it about 50 feet away onto some snow covered grass across the service drive I’d plowed already.  Six people began the process of carrying it out of the garage, but as soon as we cleared the door, the wind caught it and in three minutes it was no longer a box, but instead five pieces.

The ladies stood in horror, trying to hold their pieces as they attempted to move airborne as a kite might.  Exasperated, I managed to get end up with two pieces they held while we walked the horse, laughing hysterically at our antics, near enough so that I could take some pictures, which I did.

We returned the pieces back to the shop after the shoot and the photo organizer and the CEO both said to me, “you were right.  We should have waited.”

Ya think?

My workout for the day was the snow removal.  My joy for the day was acknowledgement that I could actually be right about something in the face of the farm community’s collective thinking. 

Thursday, March 1, 2018

So this is what retirement could look like...

Wednesday, February 28, 2018
It only takes a half day off in the middle of the week for me to start really fantasizing about retirement.  I was feeling so good about the day before that I decided on the spur to take the next day off, too.  The farm could handle my absence and I needed the mental break after several weeks of dealing with ice, snow and now mud.

I slept in a little since I’d had trouble sleeping the night before, but once I was moving, I didn’t stop.  I managed several more coats on the cabinet doors, made some breakfast and got ready for a ride.  The forecast was for more rain and for the next several days, so I was anxious to ride my third day in a row.  It wasn’t quite as warm as the previous day, but it was still dry as I rode off.

I picked a different route, choosing to ride up SR303 and then following it into Hudson and beyond, depending on how I felt and how much time I had.  Jason is off on Wednesdays and so I’d asked him to come over with my granddaughter Josie, for a visit.  We agreed that he’d call when he was ready and since he was forty minutes away, I figured that would allow me enough time to turn and head for home when he did.

I crossed under SR8 heading east for Hudson on a wide shoulder designated as a bike path.  It took me almost the entire way into town before narrowing once on the town streets.  It remained that way heading out of town, but the bike path returned and appeared to continue into Streetsboro.  As I reached Stow Road and noticed that it too had a bike lane and ran north/south, it began to rain.  I was an hour from home and decided to turn back, finding quickly that I would be facing a strong head wind for the return.

It was a ponderous ride.  The temperature was dropping into the low forties as I reached the top of the four-mile hill descent into Peninsula.  That meant pelting, cold rain with tire spray covering my face.  At least I’d be going fast.

After two hours of riding, I pulled into my drive waterlogged and shivering.  I spent the next ten minutes wiping down ‘Locke’ since I’d pledged not to let him get dirty, but was chilled to the bone by the time I made it to the shower. 

And then my son and granddaughter arrived followed by Heidi on her scooter and I got to really find out one of the great values of retirement.  We sat and talked and laughed at that precious little girl for the next two hours.  I’d worked on cabinets, ridden my bike, and enjoyed my children and grandchild.  Life is too good and I’m a lucky man.
Bike duration: Two hours.
Training Heart Rate: 135 bpm.
Calories Burned: 1,500.

Riding with Kathy...

Tuesday, February 27, 2018
It was sunny and with temperatures in the low fifties by late morning, I knew I’d be taking half a day off…and I did.

I headed home knowing that I had to do some work on the cabinets before riding and so laid out five doors, sanded them and applied a first coat of urethane.  I knew Kathy was home since I’d passed her place and seen her car on my drive in and sent her a text asking about riding.  She ignored this and a phone call and so I walked over with Dakota to confront her.  I found her on a ladder working on her cabinets.

“I’m so disgusted.  My bathroom door won’t close correctly and I’ve had those hinges off and tried different things several times,” she said.

I put the ride on hold and went at the door.  Thirty minutes later it was marginally better and she was caving into my requests to ride.  “It’ll all be here when you get back and it’s 58 degrees in February.  We have to go!” I said.

Her road bike was out of commission so she would have to ride her heavier, trail bike as a result.

“You’ve got road tires on and you’re in much better shape.  You’re going to kill me,”
 she said.


“Well…maybe…but that’s no reason not to ride,” I reasoned.

We suited up and after making an adjustment to my seat height, were ready to go.  I described the course I was taking, which included two major climbs.

“I haven’t ridden since last October,” she reminded me.

“We’ll take it slow, but you’re a beast and you’ve got great climbing gears on that bike,” I said.

I was a little worried though.  I didn’t want to discourage her, though she really is tough and pushes herself through the pain.  We reached the bottom of Everett Road hill and with no complaints or whining, she began to climb.

Frankly, I was a little worried myself after having climbed hard the day before.  I’d done a hard two hours and allowed for little recovery for a guy who really was out of shape, too.  Still, I shifted to a harder gear and began the push.

She stayed right with me to the halfway point, but the conditioning and heavier bike began to tell and she fell behind…but never stopped pedaling.  When she finally reached the gate blocking the road at the top of the steepest section, she was breathing heavily and not looking too happy. 

“Are we having fun?” I asked.

She raised her middle finger.  Then she high-fived me.

“You’re trying to kill me!”

I wasn’t, but I could see why she might think so.  We continued on Everett Road before turning north on Cleveland-Massillon for the ride to SR 303.  She liked the wide shoulders, but not what I was telling her about the remainder of the ride.  It was approaching 5 p.m. and that meant heavier traffic on 303.

“There’s one big hill and on that hill – no shoulder,” I warned as we rode east on 303, as if there was some alternative we could take.  There wasn’t and she knew it.

Cars were careful about passing us and we separated again as the climbing was beginning to tell.  Again though, she did it without stopping and made the peak with an accomplished smile. 

The remainder of the ride was pleasant.  A wide, smooth shoulder took us back to Major Road in Peninsula, a sparsely traveled, country road that descended back into the valley.  In all, we were out for about ninety minutes.

“I actually feel pretty good,” she admitted once home.  I was very impressed.  I don’t think I could have handled that course after a five-month layoff quite so well.  “You’re a good riding buddy and I’m glad you moved here.”

Day one as Kathy’s hill trainer complete without regrets.  And I’m feeling stronger with every ride.
Bike duration: One hour and 30 minutes.
Training Heart Rate: 135 bpm.
Calories Burned: 1,125.
Bonus: 21,000 steps.